Why did I do it? – The answer

I wanted to answer the silent question some of you may have. Why did I post what I did or why have I posted what I have over the past few days?

Stand up for what is right even if you stand alone

I have mentioned a few times in some of the recent blog posts or videos that I am a Domestic Violence survivor. One thing I’ve learned is that there is at least one other person out there going through the exact same thing if not similar thing you are. Standing up and doing something about it by no longer accepting that kind of behavior can show someone they can be brave enough to leave a situation they might be scared to.

Showing someone how you handle yourself against abusive behavior can help save their life or give them the courage to walk away without fear. Letting them see the aftermath of how the abuser reacts also is helpful. Letting them know that while it won’t be easy it will be worth it in the end.

Yes, all of us want our abuser or abusive person to “learn their lesson” but the truth is the majority of them won’t. They see no wrong in their actions and we will always be the bad person in their story. We will always be the person “that hurt them” but remember we aren’t the person that hurt them, we are the person who stood up and said your behavior is no longer acceptable to me I am walking away and am done. I will no longer be your punching bag, your scapegoat, or your person you cast blame on when you don’t want to get caught in your own lies.

Staying silent sometimes allows the pattern of abusive behavior to continue and worsen because they have gotten away with it for so long. Once they are exposed and their true colors shown in the light which is what they don’t want the world to see they become more aggressive in making you out to be the monster of their story. You know what, that’s ok. You’ll be ok, because your everyday character will speak for itself. You are the same with or without a video on. People can always tell.

I remember with my ex husband people could tell automatically he wasn’t the same person he pretended to be in front of everyone. I had pet sitting clients who didn’t want him in their homes and deep down I knew why but could never say anything.

In more recent events, the extra nice and flipping the on and off switch became too much for me to even sit and watch which is why most chose to talk with me but never really said why. In yesterday’s situation just from speaking with us and how we carried ourselves those in authority could see what was really going on before any such videos were posted.

What I hated the most about the recent situations is how friendships were destroyed and how I had to watch as they kept driving what a terrible person I was to the friend they separated me from, and me knowing the real truth the whole time. Plus how I had to degrade myself. I had made myself a promise after my abusive relationship I would never degrade myself for anyone and found myself doing that just to keep a job.

MORAL OF THE STORY: you share your story, you tell it. You tell it to release it, you tell it to help someone else. You share it because you can, you share it because you survived!